My Way
by Mesalline
Summary: The Face of Boe reflects on his long life, just before he gives The Doctor a final message. Only my second song fic, so comments and con crit are most welcome. Please R&R, thank you.


_Authors Notes: This one shot idea popped into my head whilst I was listening to Ray Quinns "My Way." Frank Senatra sang the original version. This plot bunny wouldn't leave me alone. I've never written a story abut the face of boe before. And this is only my second song fic. Enjoy ) Comments and Con Crit most appreciated! _

My Way 

_And now, the end is here  
And so I face the final curtain  
My friend, I'll say it clear  
I'll state my case, of which I'm certain  
I've lived a life that's full  
I traveled each and ev'ry highway  
And more, much more than this, I did it my way  
_

For the first time, in a long time, I'm surprised to find that the sight that greets me fills me with joy. He once was older than me, much, much older, but time takes its toll on us all. Time is a funny thing, and it's ironic that it's me delivering a message now. A message that will perhaps save his life, perhaps not. But a message, none the less, and one that has given me something to live for. My life has been, well, to sum it up…Long. Long and full of life, joy, happiness, sadness, and plenty of adventures. I chuckle as I remember some of our adventures and he looks at me strangely. He probably thinks I'm going senile in my old age. He's probably right. My old friend doesn't recognize me for who I really am, but he will, in time. And that's exactly how I want it. It's easier to say good bye this way. And hopefully, he'll remember me. Not in this way, but for the simple fact that right to the every end I do things my way.

_Regrets, I've had a few  
But then again, too few to mention  
I did what I had to do and saw it through without exemption  
I planned each charted course, each careful step along the byway  
And more, much more than this, I did it my way _

I notice that he has a new companion. I know her, but she does not know me. I doubt that she would believe it if she ever puts two and two together. I remember his last companion, Rose. A deep sense of despair and regret fills me before I can stop it. And- he notices. He always notices. He looks at me with confusion, worry, sadness and…something I can't quite place.

I've regretted my past actions. Sometimes from the very moment I've pulled the trigger, or left someone behind. Sometimes it's not been till years later. But life is not filled with good people and bad people. That was what he taught me, the man crouching beside me. It's what's inside that counts; and to have the courage to make a stand, to say no.

_Yes, there were times, I'm sure you knew  
When I bit off more than I could chew  
But through it all, when there was doubt  
I ate it up and spit it out  
I faced it all and I stood tall and did it my way  
_

In the past I have been very…free. And sometimes, it left me in…ah, situations that sometimes were too big for me to handle. But you were their, even if you don't realize it yet. And when you weren't their, I held my head up high and remembered what you taught me. I made a stand, to make you proud. I made a few enemies along the way, but who doesn't? If only you could hear me thinking now. I sound so cliché.

_I've loved, I've laughed and cried  
I've had my fill, my share of losing  
And now, as tears subside, I find it all so amusing  
To think I did all that  
And may I say, not in a shy way,  
"Oh, no, oh, no, not me, I did it my way"_

I've had more than my fair share of love, but then I've never played fair. _Says the Con Man._ I laugh to think what I once was- and what I am now. My mother would die of a heart attack if she could see me now. Maybe I would too. I'm glad I can't look in a mirror any more. I told you once that I was the first person to be signed up for the time agency, and how proud they were of me. Would they be proud now? I wonder. Are you?

I'm young again, leading my team to a murder scene. The place is swarming with police. We greet the head officer, Kathy Swanson. I think that was her name. It's been along time.

"Are you always this dressy for a murder investigation?" she asked me, incredulously.

"What, would you rather me naked?" is my lewd reply.

"God help me…the rumors are true…"

The memory fades almost as quickly as it appears. It happens allot. Perhaps I am going senile after all.

_For what is a man, what has he got?  
If not himself, then he has naught  
To say the things he truly feels and not the words of one who kneels  
The record shows I took the blows and did it my way.  
_

It clicks. That look in your eyes- I know what it is. Loneliness and regret. You hide it from every one else, but you can't hide it from me. Because I feel the same emotions as you. When I look into your eyes it's like looking into a mirror. Only this mirror doesn't crack. It's already broken. But the message I hold will give you hope. I've been longing to tell you for a long time, Time-Lord, but I couldn't. It has to be now. A year of grief and despair awaits, a year that never was. My last adventure. With my last breath I deliver a spark of hope to a lonely Time God.

"You are not alone."

_Yes, it was my way. _

_Fin. _


End file.
